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November 11, 2011

Butch v. Tommy - Week 11

Butch and Tommy had another mostly down week. Both Butch and Tommy started out the week well - taking the first two games [USC and Stanford] - but then it all went downhill from there. Wazzu tripped up both Butch and Tommy [worse for him since he actually, foolishly, predicted Wazzu to win the game outright - the effects of too much sipping from the jug of two-year-old nog]. After that unpleasant result, another unpleasant result occurred and it was not the result of strong drink, because we know they do not allow that in Utah. So the Ootes came to Arizona and completely sober, slapped around the Team Formerly Known As The Spittle Spewin' Stoops, costing both Butch and Tommy yet another game. As if it could not get worse, UCLA then surprised Arizona State by showing up for a game - or ASU did not show up for the game - one of the two. Oregon beat Washington by 17 points - a half point better than the spread - and that gave Tommy his only other win of the week. Since Butch had a lucky win last week with Stanford over USC, he readily accepts a half point loss as payback on Tommy's behalf. But Tommy has bigger things on his mind this week. Some people may think Stanford against Oregon is the big game of the week but not in BvT where Tommy's youth football team - The Mighty Wedgies [as we like to call them] - are playing for the Championship of the World!!! Well, that is what you tell the kids they are playing for and they believe you because it is not until they get to be teenagers when they develop pleasant jaded personalities.



Tommy: Well, what do we have here? Gotta love it, Butch. Tommy snuck under the wire with a half point cover by the SchNikes, and as a result, won the week and tied the match. Hear those footsteps? Tommy's generally a finisher in November, and unfortunately for Butch, his season is running on a parallel plane with his Cougs, which meant a fast start, and then a slow descent back to earth. Away we go.

Butch: Remember, Tommy, cheaters never prosper. But Butch does accept the half-point loss as payback for the previous week's lucky win. Meanwhile - much more importantly - the Wedgies Rule!




Arizona (-11) at Colorado

Tommy: Who cares? Shambles Of The Stoops Era-45, Early Shambles Of The Embree Era-25.

Butch: The 4/20's scored 17 points on your boys last week, Tommy and almost covered - how did that happen?!? This game is in the morning but Butch is gonna get some industrial strength nog and…sigh…he is gonna hate himself in the morning…Butch selects the 4/20's to cover.



Washington at USC (-13)

Tommy: Tommy loves his Trojans as much as anyone, and realizes the Husky defense blows, but thirteen points with the defense that SC has is a little too rich for Tommy's blood. The Skirted One is praying for a one point win against the Great Sark who has owned SC since he got to Seattle. Good Guys-38, No, Barkley Is Not Better Than Luck-35.

Butch: Tommy, you know when you are watching a horror movie and the crowd is screaming to the character on screen not to go down into that dark basement? "For crying in the mud, don't go down there!!!" That is Butch this week with this game. There is no reason to feel that your boys will cover this insane spread ["insane" due to the recent series history] but Butch thinks the Hussies shot their emotional wad last week against the Nikes and if you are not going to be brave and save your boys from the evil menace in the basement, then Butch will man up and have to do it for you. So here goes Butch…taking one step down toward the dark basement…and selecting your boys of Troy to win and cover.



UCLA at Utah (-7)

Tommy: HMMMMM! Where to go here? The bRuins are playing better of late, but they're 1-3 against the number on the road this season. The Utes have also found their stride the last couple of weeks, but Tommy's not a fan of them either. Tommy always says when you don't know what's going to happen, bet the way you want to see it happen so you can enjoy yourself. Two Utes-34, Bad News Bears-21.

Butch: Whether or not the Ootes have an offense is debatable since they are hampered by a shrub at quarterback but the Ootes actually have a defense and a good one at that. Butch also selects the Ootes to win and cover.



Oregon State at California (-9.5)

Tommy: Despite what the Bears did last week against Butchie's Cougs, Tommy ain't buyin' this spread either. The Mighty Beav has won five straight in the Bay Area, and their defense is sure to confuse young Zach Maynard, who is often confused without anyone trying to do it. Bears win, Beav covers. Remember When Tedford Was Elite?-24, Two Straight Bowless Seasons For Riley-21.

Butch: What are you, Tommy, like, 0-and-forever on picking the Fighting Tedfords' games this year? Time to retire your Tedford Tike God - it does not work like the Embree model. The Fighting Tedfords are one win away from Bowl Party Time, plus they have a pretty good defense and just in case you forgot - this is a Hyde week for Riley's Rodents. Butch selects the Fighting Tedfords to win and cover.



Oregon at Stanford (-3.5)

Tommy: The Cardinal are on a mission and they just find a way. They handed the Ducks their last conference loss in Palo Alto, and Tommy expects a repeat performance. Hopefully, the Cardinal make the national title game and the SchNikes get chosen to play in the Rose Bowl game. Otherwise, it's off to San Diego for arrogant Chip, where he'll be sure to dominate someone because they're not elite. Team With The Best QB-45, Bellotti Won More Big Games-41.

Butch: The Trees are still undefeated SU and ATS this year and Butch does not expect that to change. In fact the Trees might win this one with a few points to spare. Butch selects the Trees to win and cover.




Arizona State (-12.5) at Wazzu

Tommy: The Cougs haven't been within 13 points of someone since...over a month ago, and that ain't gonna change this week against Drunken Dennis, who is angry about an embarrassing loss to the bRuins. Dennis is a mean guy when he's drunk.
Need UCLA To Lose???!!!-42, Is Paul Wulff In Danger?-21.

Butch: In danger!?! Not at all, Tommy - everything is swell at Wazzu. It is those stupid fans' faults for not knowing football and having unrealistic expectations like winning games and stuff. Dumb fans - and they do not fork over their hard-earned money after the team does not win games, can you believe that, Tommy?!? Stupid, ignorant fans. Sporky needs to win out to win the Pac-12 South - this is win number one of three. Butch selects Sporky to win and cover.



BONUS GAME!!!




Infant Jesus of Prague Kingsmen (-1) vs. St. Al's/St. Pat's Celtics

Tommy: Tommy's got a more important game to focus on this Sunday: his grade school JV football team is playing for the Chicagoland Catholic Grade School Conference championship. Both teams finished the season 6-2, and IJP won the regular season meeting 20-15. The teams have faced very different roads to the championship. The Celtics blasted through the first two rounds of the playoffs, winning those games by a combined 69-0. The Kingsmen faced the tougher half of the bracket, avenging both of their regular season losses. They shut out 7-1 St. Alexander 16-0, and stunned undefeated St. Raphael 18-11 with three TD passes in the driving wind. The Celtics are the more physical team, while Tom's Kingsmen have a speed advantage. Tom's picking his guys to get it done. Kingsmen-14, Shamrocks-9.

Butch: Tommy's team is technically called the IJP Whatevers but here in BvT they are called the Wedgies [due to their unique playing alignment] and who in their right mind calls their football team the Celtics?!? - especially when the NBA consists of a bunch of whining wealthy buffoons? The Wedgies only lost those two regular season games due to the mail getting delivered to the wrong house [ a euphemism for something Butch cannot say in public]. But Tommy righted the ship - hey, good coaching will do that right away, you know! - and now the Wedgies are an unstoppable juggernaut or an unjuggered stopanaut. Either way, Butch selects the Wedgies to win and cover against the basketball team pretending to be a football team. To find out who won, click here for the final result on Sunday evening.






Tommy

Last Week: 3-3

Overall: 33-29-1




Butch

Last Week: 2-4

Overall: 33-29-1






+++++++sponsored by Greg Davis Sports Photography+++++++++

The college football prognosticating season is here…and you know what that means…[well besides Butch and Tommy going at each other's throats] It's time for a whole new season of Cougar Athletics! Football, soccer, volleyball, men's & women's basketball, baseball, track & field and tennis, just to name a few, are coming up right around the corner. If you need "game action" photographs for your newspaper, magazine, web site, blog, etc., then Greg Davis Sports Photography should be your choice for all things "Cougar" and "Pac-12 Conference"! Coverage for specific athletes or upcoming events is also available. Check out the images from games, practices and events from last season, and be sure to come back often for uploads from all of this season's action.


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